I don't know about you, but when I hear about sports players having superstitious rituals they go through to "help" them win a game I roll my eyes and laugh a little bit. Will not washing your socks for an entire season really help you to win games? Will a certain song that you listen to, behavioral routine, or food make that much of a difference?
Well, I am starting to realize that I must think the same way...
When one has a child who still will not consistently sleep through the night after six years one comes to try about anything just to get.some.sleep!
His sleeping patterns last, usually, a few days to a week. Then they switch up. For no apparent reason. the longest he has consistently slept through the night in 6 years was 3 weeks. I think he has done that a few times. So I am constantly trying to find that one variable, or combination of variables that will get me some hours of sleep without being woke up. 6.5 hours of sleep is about the sweet zone for me. If I consistently get less then that it is bad. But 6.5 hours is doable.
One big change with him is that he is finally going to sleep closer to 10:30/11:00 than midnight or later. I am very thankful for that. EO's work, so we keep doing that. Oil that kid's feet up! One combination did not work but this one does. I WILL NOT run out of this combination!
Then the Body Butter that I made with Lavender in it. I rub his whole body down in it every night, plus the other EO's. He has slept through the night every night since I started that so we are sticking with it! That has been 5 days I think.
For awhile taking a hot shower at night worked. So we went with that.
For awhile a bubble bath at night worked so we went with that.
For awhile a certain bedtime snack seemed to work.
Snuggling with a certain blanket.
Snuggling with a certain blanket just out of the dryer.
Snuggling with certain pillows in our bed with a blanket just out of the dryer while slathered with EO's after reading his choice of a bedtime story and having his chew toy to chomp on.
Do you get the picture? I have never had to work this hard to get a child to sleep!
I have tried the last few days (this is not the first time we have tried this) to encourage him to sleep in his own room. Three nights ago he fell asleep quickly in a pile of blankets I made up for him on his floor because he refused to sleep in his bed and he didn't want me anywhere near him. Two nights ago it took him over an hour to fall asleep and he was all over the place. Last night he insisted he be back in my bed until he fell asleep and was plastered up against my side to ensure himself that I was RIGHT THERE with him.
Getting him to sleep is only 1/2 the battle. He will eventually fall asleep. It is the middle of the night wakening that is hardest for me. When he falls asleep in our bed at night (360 out of 365 nights a year), I carry him to his bed and then try to get as much sleep as I can before he wakes up. He stays asleep. BUT, if he wakes in the night, crawls in bed with us, falls asleep, and I carry him back to his bed? He will wake up within minutes every.single.time. When he crawls in our bed at night he actually will lay there between us and put a hand on both of us to make sure that we are there (if he is not plastered against my side trying to get as close as possible).
So I have given up with trying to put him back to bed after he wakes in the night. It isn't so bad if he makes it to 6:30 (which he did for awhile the beginning of this month). But then he switched to 3:30....uggg... Once I wake in the night I have a terrible time getting back to sleep - and knowing he is in there makes it worse. JJ is a lot like me, we take forever to fall asleep, unlike my husband who falls asleep within 3.6 seconds from laying his head on the pillow. Wish I could do that lol!
Of course, when he does sleep through the night in his own bed it takes me several nights to adjust to not waking at 3:30 or 6:30 and waiting for him to come in.
So this morning I decided, I am just going to let the kid be. Of all of the issues that we deal with with him (although he is maturing very, very well!!), does it really matter where he sleeps? He won't still be doing this when he is 20 (he WILL NOT!) so I am just going to let him figure it out when he figures it out. He stopped wetting at night by himself this summer. No special cajoling or sticker charts or whatever. He just stopped. So eventually he will just stop waking in the night too:) He will, I promise myself all the time, he will!!
One thing that he asks for as part of the routine every single night is "please pray that I don't have bad dreams" then he follows my prayer up with his own:) So, whatever EO's, bath rituals, back scratching vs back rubbing rituals, whatever bed he falls asleep in, whatever snack he decides on, and whatever time that he eventually falls asleep and wakes up...I know that JJ trusts that God will protect him when he goes to sleep. JJ knows that he is safe. JJ knows that when he doesn't feel safe he can come to us and we will make him safe. JJ knows without a doubt that we have his back and God has his back.
...and that is worth all of the sleep I have ever lost. Even if I do keep trying to find the "sweet spot" of superstitious ritual to try to eek out a little more sleep;)
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