Yesterday was 4 weeks since our hot tub was installed and fully functional. I must say that I am pleased with the results. By far the best outcome so far is that JJ has slept through the night for 29 nights straight!
29 nights! That has never happened in his 7 years!
I know that when people can't sleep they say to drink warm milk or to take a hot bath. Well, we have made him get in the hot tub every night (and by extension I get to as well lol!) He is falling asleep faster and staying asleep in his own bed. The week before we got the hot tub running he had a night when he was up until 1 and one he was up until 3. Now he has been asleep most nights by 11ish. We also got him a fuzzy, soft electric blanket so that keeps him warm all night long. He used to kick off his blankets then crawl in our bed frozen, but I think the hot tub is calming his body enough to sleep and the electric blanket is helping him stay just warm enough to sleep through the night.
I just hope it continues!
I will say, while I was hesitant to spend the money on a hot tub, a month of sleeping through the night, for the first time since before he came (because of my herniated disk pain before he came) has been worth the cost:)
My back pain also also been improved. I sit in it every day and have found that I am much less sore than usual. I was having a lot of increased pain before we got it, and it seems to be better. I have several times a day when I bend over to pick something up and have no pain. That is very rare for me and when it first was happening 3 weeks ago I would tear up because it was so wonderful to not have the constant chronic pain. I am happy that I am now getting used to being pretty much pain free - but will not take it for granted! Yesterday I sewed a baby blanket requiring me to sit on the floor some (which I normally cannot do) and stood and chopped peppers to freeze from the garden. Both of those things would usually leave me pretty stiff the next morning. But here I am without any stiffness.
Loving it!
Another benefit has been the calming it gives to my sensory challenged kids. I learned years ago that when the kids are in their "completely out of control" state, that a hot bath is the only way I can get them to calm down. I don't know if it is the heat of the water, the tactile sensory stimulation, or what it is. But it has been very helpful with Grace. If I suggest a bath to her, she always says yes. When JJ is out of control he won't say yes. But we have had a couple of his intense tantrums in the past few days and once I got him to stop hurting me I asked him to get in the hot tub. He usually calms much faster, within minutes.
Brain research shows that there are 2 kinds of tantrums - one where the kid is mad and wanting their own way. Typical tantrum. But for kids with trauma or neurological "stuff," there is another type of tantrum where the kid's brain fires into "all alert" and goes into "fight, flight, or freeze" mode. We have one kid who goes into "freeze" mode. It is scary to watch it. A deer in the headlights experience where it is clear that no information is being processed other than FEAR, FEAR, FEAR.
When our kiddos who go into "fight" mode have their tantrums, it is also scary but mostly from the aspect of keeping us safe, then our property. It is hard to deal with the venom that comes out of their mouths during those times, but what is probably most difficult is the intense shame that happens once their brain calms. They then realize what they did and are worried about the rip to the relationship because of their behavior. If we treated them with harshness in that time frame, it adds to their shame core. But when we physically reconnect with hugs and snuggles and letting them know that we still love them, then relationship repairs much quicker. Initially they push against us, wanting to push us away before we (in their minds) push them away. In their fear of rejection pushing against us gives them the control. We work through that and move forward. It is frustrating when it happens over, and over, and over...and over. But we also realize that they have little control over it. It is improving with time:)
Anyway, for some reason having them get into the hot tub calms them very quickly and we don't have near as many of the after effects.
I am not so naive as to believe that our hot tub has made sleeping and tantrums all better now. But it is a tool that is working for now, and for that I am thankful for the blessing that it is:)
